Monday, July 3, 2017

We-yrr, We-yrr, We-yrr.....I hope.

I always believe what's on Google.  Stay with me here.

I had an appointment with a cardiologist today, tests required.  We arrived before the office actually opened and found that even the elevator wasn't even awake, so we climbed up three flights of stairs (Energy level 60%).  After some pounding upon the office door, the one living person in the building responded to our fists and cracked the door open slightly and said "You're early!" and I was waiting for her to put up a sign on the door and say "Go Away and Come Back Tomorrow!" (Oz reference).

But we were allowed in eventually and I was summoned.  Lay down. Sticky stuff placed on my hairy chest, wires to a machine.



And, yes, I was wearing my toupee, OK? The technician gave a me a pity shave.  Actually he did the shave and arranged it on my head

Measured shot of goo into my arm, go sit down in reception.  I could not eat or drink anything (except water - Perrier is my choice) so I sat and read.  Jackie drove us to the office so the moment I had gone into the tombs, off she went to Starbucks, and so I sat and then was summoned back to the room, and there talked to the cardiologist.

The average resting heart rate (HRrest) for a 60 year old is 72 beats per minute. 60 year old males average heart rates of 70 bpm while females average slightly higher at 73 bpm2. The normal resting heart rate range for all adults and children 10 and over is between 60 and 100 beats per minute.  90% of 60 year olds resting pulses fall within the range of 54 to 91 bpm. In general, an adult's resting heart rate will be lower for those in better athletic condition.  This information kindly grabbed from Healthly.io.

My heart beat per minute is 49.  With some body movement I can get the beat to 55/56.  This also means that I should be running for marathons for Nigeria, as that' s more in their territory.  Only 5% of the men on the planet have such a heart beat rate and I am not sure if all of them are runners for or from Nigeria.  Me? Run? 

And heres a cool note.  University studies (on the web) show that only horses, elephants, and large whales have a slower heart rate than me.  Hamsters run close, though, at 55.

So we made a slight change in my prescription.  Change one pill to 1/2 a day so it becomes  


to bread crumbs
From a pill that was 6/16 of an inch

I am in the market for any ginsu knives.  You see how tiny those pills are?

Jackie wants the knives so she can (ever so slightly) touch the point of a knife to my forehead to see if I'm asleep or dead. Just a loving tap, I hope.

The title of this piece comes from the electrocardiograph sound of the heart beating. If you ever take one or even listen to a baby in the womb, that's the sound I hear.   

Google told me about the ability to see what the heart beat means.  I'm waiting to hear that We-yrr, We-yrr, We-yrr..Dogs' heart beats are three times faster than mine.  Maybe I should lay down in the yard and pant.

Energy --maybe 1%.   I'm going to bed.  Curl up on the couch, or maybe under the desk.  More updates from the floor of my den soon!


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